[So it was a mistake to tell him, is what she's hearing. It's what has made it so difficult to tell Tifa what little she could. She's kept it to herself because she knows what it does. Balthier has never deserved to get pulled into all of that and now he can't even look at her without thinking about it. If he's trying to reassure her, it's not working.

"Not because you're not strong."

Is she, though? What she displays--is that strength or cowardice? Both, maybe. Why can't it be both. She can feel her heart steadily attempt to lodge itself into her throat. She's never talked about it like this with someone before. Talking about it makes it weigh heavier. It's still heavy just thinking about it, but in her thoughts at least she can distance herself.

She feels boxed in. As in she doesn't have a place she can retreat to.]

I should just be grateful that I have your attention, right? That I have Tifa and the others to look after me? [She can feel herself getting heated over it, something she wants to crush under foot.] ...I am grateful. It's so much more than I deserve. I want to sit here and say that just having that is good enough. If I say it, I'm lying. I feel like a part of me is dying every day. Before, at least I could just keep it to myself. Now I have to live with you feeling the way you do. With Tifa feeling the way she does. That only makes it worse.

[She has to force out another laugh because she knows it she doesn't, she might just cry instead.]

I never should have said anything to you.